This Is For You

   I have started and restarted this post about four different times, not really sure of what I wanted to say. This week, I have had so many different emotions from anger and frustration to love and thankfulness. I've recently started reading posts from my friend Stacie, who is one of the most beautiful, Godly women I have had the pleasure of knowing. Here lately she has been posting about three girls named Olivia, Kelsey, and Libby. These three girls are currently facing some of the toughest trials that life can throw at them. In particular Olivia, whom I've read the most about, is currently facing a life-threatening situation after being in a terrible car accident. (I strongly encourage you all to read Stacie's most recent post. It's life changing.)
http://usedbychrist.wordpress.com/2013/09/27/psalm-99-10-a-stronghold-in-times-of-struggle/

   I want to take a moment to tell you about the girl who writes that blog. Stacie Holland recently graduated from the University of Mobile with a degree in Music Education. I have only known her for a little over a year, but I honestly consider her one of my greatest friends. It's an understatement to say that this girl and her family have been through the ringer. She has had things happen to her that most people could not even imagine, but never once did I ever hear her complain or feel sorry for herself. Her strength and determination are awe-inspiring, even though she would never admit it. She has lifted me up and encouraged me more times than I could count and I am so honored to call her a friend. I mention her because she reminds me so much of those three girls facing such terrible circumstances, because she never gives up. These girls have never given up. They aren't bitter or angry because of their circumstances. They aren't sitting locked up in their rooms feeling sorry for themselves. They're out there, living for Jesus harder than I have ever seen anyone live. These girls inspire me to be better. They remind me not to take life for granted, because we never know how much of it we have left. God is moving in these ladies so hard, and I am so excited to see how the world is changed because of their testimonies.

   I mentioned in the beginning of the post that I had been somewhat of an emotional roller coaster this week. Between a crazy work schedule and coming down with bronchitis, I honestly have not been the best mood. I'm not going to try and pretend that I am this super perky ball of sunshine 24/7, because let's be real, I'm a girl; that ain't gonna happen. It's amazing though that God still manages to get to me even when I don't feel particularly reachable. I've been doing a devotion about Elisha and his ridiculous faith that he had in God. Between reading his story and reading the stories of those three girl, my faith was feeling incredibly sub par. That's the beautiful thing though: God doesn't compare us to each other. We're the ones that do that to ourselves. Because it's not us doing the moving, it's God. HE'S the one who gives us second chances and new beginnings, not us. So don't take this life for granted, please. Step out in absolutely ridiculous faith toward the calling the Lord has for you. Take the chances you were always afraid to take. Don't shut out your best friend just because you're afraid of being a little emotional. Live a life full of a love. Don't ever give up. In a nutshell, just live like Jesus.
   



  

Me encanta la forma en que me amas

   Random realization of the day: I'm one of those super weird people who gets completely lost in worship music in the strangest places. I discovered this while I was washing dishes with my Ipod cranked up and totally forgot what I was even doing about halfway through the song. I had heard this particular song dozens upon dozens of times, but the words hit me in a completely different way tonight. The lyrics of Casting Crowns' song "The Altar and the Door," have never meant more to me than they do now.

   "I'm trying so hard to stop trying so hard. Just let you be who you are. Lord, who you are in me."

   I had always tried so hard to make myself good enough for Jesus.....how crazy is that? Nothing I could ever do could make me good or perfect or worthy of the love that my Savior offers. Yet He still loves me anyway, simply because of who He is! I had tried to force everything to happen instead of letting God be His totally awesome self and trust that He was enough. I chose to title this post "Me encanta la forma en que me amas," which translates into "I love the way you love me" in Spanish. Now don't think for one second that I can actually speak Spanish. I took French in high school and have Google translate to thank for my seemingly impressive title choice. I couldn't think of a better way to explain how I'm feeling today though than with that phrase. I love (and I mean LUUUURRVE) the way that God loves me, because it is without a doubt the easiest relationship for me to have. He loves me, He loves all of us, simply because of who He is! Does this relationship come without some difficulties? Negative. If I've learned anything though, it's that the more you draw closer to God and the more you do for Him, the more this world is going to attack you. So, in my opinion, I consider an attack from the things of this world quite a compliment =) (told you I was one of those people). Take my mission trip for example. I'm leaving for Baja, Mexico in 99, yes 99 days from now. (Side note: I can't believe it's already down to double digit days!!) While I know without a doubt that this is where I need to be at, I have received some criticism about going. My heart is in this trip 110%, and I know it'll change me for the better. God has called us to spread his Good News to all the nations, and I intend to follow through. For someone who gave His life for me, taking time out of my meager schedule is the least I can do. I would love your prayers and support during this life-changing event, and if you want to know how to help me on this journey, just let me know and I'll figure something out ;) God Bless and nighty night!

A Cliche at Its Finest

   "Everything happens for a reason." I'm usually not one to use cliches, but this one really describes where I'm at in life right now. After I took a step back and realized that my addiction to perfection was destroying not only my spirit, but my relationship with God and what He was trying to accomplish, and allowed Him to free me from it, I found out that I had so much more joy than I ever had before. Sometimes the hardest thing for us to do is to let go (and I mean REALLY let go) of what we struggle with and trust that our Heavenly Father knows what He's doing. We never think that true positives can come out of negative experiences. We are unable to wrap our finite minds around the idea that we don't always have to follow the "traditional" life path. Yes, I'm not going to graduate in four years. I'm not going by what I thought was the right way to do things. And that scared me more than anything. It made me think I was defective, like something was wrong with me. In reality, not graduating has opened up so many doors for me that might not have been opened had I graduated this year. I got a job at a place that has made me discover my love for painting and crafting. I'm going on a life-changing trip to Baja, Mexico in December and taking the first step towards my ultimate dream of becoming a medical missionary. Through this trip, I have had the honor of becoming acquainted with Arianna, my missionary representative. I think this is one of the best examples of "everything happens for a reason." Out of every person that could have been assigned to be my representative, the fact that Arianna was chosen is truly, I believe, divine intervention. As I have been able to talk to and swap testimonies with her, she is slowly becoming not only my mission rep, but also a really good friend. Our stories and life experiences are so similar, and every time we are able to talk I feel encouraged and uplifted. I may not have ever had that opportunity had my life gone "according to plan." Whose plan am I really following though? I had always said that I wanted to follow God's path, but up until a few months ago, all I was doing was trying to force myself down a path that obviously was not meant for me. Once I began trusting in what God had for me, everything began to fall into place so much easier. Is it perfect? Absolutely not. It is, however, much better than where I was at. Trusting that God knows what he's doing much more than I do puts me in a better place than I could ever put myself in. There's a reason that I'm here at this place, in this moment. There's a reason I've taken a short detour on my path. Everything that has happened so far in my life has happened for a reason......but I've never been much for cliches ;)